Ticket Giveaway: Animal Collective @ Merriweather Post Pavillion
It was only a matter of time until Animal Collective played a show at the namesake venue of their seminal album, Merriweather Post Pavillion. Immediately heralded by many as the best work of 2009 despite its early January release, the full-length has since been followed up by the Fall Be Kind EP, a collection of tracks that didn’t make the album cut, as well as a soundtrack for the experimental psychedelic film, ODDSAC. Things have recently been quiet on the AnCo front, making this return to the DC-Baltimore area all the more important of a hometown show.
We have two tickets to give away to this Saturday’s show. All you have to do is list your favorite hybrid animal in the comments. Bonus points for made-up answers with lengthy descriptions. Go crazy with this, people. Put the liger to shame.
To those of you who don’t end up our lucky winners, tickets are still available HERE.
STREAM: Animal Collective – “My Girls”
- Posted by Adrian
- 20 Comments
My favorite mashed-up animal would have the body of a beaver, the face of a duck, webbed feet, aaaaaand a poisonous spur. Oh and it would lay eggs. Haha, wouldn’t that be crazy?
Liger would be the obvious choice here (“Lion in a Coma” mixed with “We Tigers”), so I’m gonna say a Grolar Bear…Grizzly mixed with a Polar Bear. It’d win a Rabbit.
Liger would be the obvious choice here (“Lion in a Coma” mixed with “We Tigers”), so I’m gonna say a Grolar Bear…Grizzly mixed with a Polar Bear. It’d win a Rabbit.
Real: Tigon (because Liger is too obvious)
Totally made up: Pega-corn (Half Pegasus, Half Unicorn), because I’m a girl.
Part puppy, part kitten, and part baby duck
It would be called a Pupkittuck (pronounced Pup-Kid-Uck) and it’s specifically designed to pick up chicks and rule Tumblr with an iron fist of cuteness.
In honor of two of my favorite Animal Collective songs, “Who Could Win A Rabbit” and “Daffy Duck,” I give you the Rabbiduck.
Is it a kosher duck that reads the Torah, a duck with rabies that can’t spell properly, or a rabbit with a beak that can fly and swim?
We report. You decide.
Palligator. Alligator superhero who’s your pal, but sometimes he’s an asshole, just like pals and alligators are.
Parken:
A parrot and chicken hybrid. This hybrid would be found in the US for the temperate climate. The feathers would be nice and bright like a parrot but the body would be small and squatty like a chicken. His tail would be a mix of long, stable feathers and smaller, floppy feathers. The small chicken like face would be held up by a long neck and the claws/feet would be large (like clown shoes large) while the legs would be just big enough to support this weird looking animal.
All in all, people would collect this animal like Zhu-Zhu pets because of the different color feathers but for those who did not know any better this would just be their next dinner. And in 20 years time, the bird would become an invasive species and grow in size to become a star of a bad Syfy movie!
Pigacle
Pigeon+Barnacle
This would probably be the most annoying animal because pigeons are already annoying but it would have the penis to body ratio of a barnacle which is one of the largest of all animals. Not only would you have to watch out for pigeons eating your food and such, but if the pigeon was aroused and was flying near your head you would probably get smacked in the face.
A barnacle penis is about 8 times the length of its body so in ratio to an average pigeon, the Pigacle would have about a 8ft dong.
The Pigacle would attach itself to objects such as cars, buses, and strollers and grow feathers and shell around it in order to feed. Its diet consists of hot dogs, falafel, plankton, and bread.
A brab. The torso, legs and head of a bear, but with the pincers of a crab. (Proportional of course.)
It excels in not giving a fuck. It just pinches the shit out of any motherfucker that crosses its path. The noble brab forages mainly for berries and roots.
Its only natural predator is the brainsaw, which is a bear with chainsaw arms. This creature has no natural predator.
eaglecuda
the head of barracuda and the body of a bald eagle.
Imagine the talons of an eagle http://www.skolaiimages.com/stock/albums/eagles/baldeagle_a_037.jpg
and the massive wings of an eagle
http://www.wallpaperweb.org/wallpaper/animals/1600×1200/Magnificent_Wings_Bald_Eagle.jpg
and then imagine it with this head
http://malialitman.files.wordpress.com/2010/11/barracuda.jpg
that would be the most badass animal ever. it would fuck your shit up.
I am so surprised that no one has mentioned the infamous Platypaca, a most natural combination of a platypus and an alpaca. It’s an open-concept animal. It do with do; it dance when it dance; it be what it be. But all Platypaca have some similar characteristic, of course. They only eat other Platypaca. They are cannibals, which is why you haven’t heard of them until now. Cannibalism hasn’t been accepted my our society yet so the Platypaca choose to remain in the barren, lifeless Wymoing. If they could vote, it is without a doubt that every single Platypaca would vote for Jon Stewart. Stay gold, Platypaca, stay gold.
The rainbow bird—a hybrid of all the angry birds.
The rainbow bird is found in many different settings from inner city to rural desert. It is best known for its destructive, violent temper and by-any-means-necessary approach to life. For recreation it can be found shattering planks of wood, ice, and cement.
It is not advisable to cross a rainbow bird. Many different animals, most notably the grigs—green pigs—have attempted to steal the rainbow bird’s eggs. The rainbow bird mercilessly tracks down and slaughters these animals leaving vast carnage and destruction in its wake.
The rainbow bird has a host of different talents and skills it uses when exacting revenge on its adversaries. It can dive like a kamikaze pilot, mysteriously split into three equally-sized and sharp nosed birds, detonate itself, drop a nascent egg* like an anvil, and use its beak to boomerang. The rainbow bird can even instantaneously gain weight.
While the rainbow bird possesses many exotic skills and talents it does lack the fundamental ability of flight. Indeed, the rainbow bird only finds itself airborne after being propelled from a slingshot.
Another downfall of the rainbow bird is that once launched from a slingshot its fate is sealed. It is theorized that the inability to fly and inevitable doom when soaring through the air are the roots of the rainbow bird’s violent ways.
*A prominent question in rainbow bird studies is why a rainbow bird is willing to sacrifice a nascent egg in its efforts to recover recently stolen eggs. More research is needed.
a combination chicken and bee. it lays golden eggs filled with honey and won’t sting you for taking them. they require minimal maintenance and love to dance, preferably to techno.
Pigme – me and a pig.
MANBEARPIG
Have you ever heard of the infamous Opossird. Wierd. I know. But somewhere along the way an ppossum and a bird had babies and produced the opposird. And let me tell you, it’s the ugliest freaking thing alive. Opossums are scary to begin with. Think round beady eyes and a long naked tail. And then mix in a two-foot wingspan and a large hooked beak, and you’ve got something like Big Bird on Crack meets the Green Goblin. Now that’s something I don’t want in my back yard.
Thats easy: the Beefalo. Very low in cholesterol and is said to taste just as good as classic steak, if not better.
FMLCat – This cat does nothing cute or adorable of note. Instead, the FMLCat, by its very nature nomenclature (of the Anhedonia genus, and differentiated by the presence of the SMH gene), aims to completely fuck your life over by a) shitting in your pillows, b) scratching up your favorite chairs / limbs, c) begging for your attention only to attach itself to your face for an indefinite period of time. Youtube videos have been attempted to capture the FMLCat in the wild, but the footage turns up only as white noise, and the viewer starts coughing up Fancy Feast every few days.
half tarzier half owl because it would be all knowing and in every movie it would play the part of the wise best friend…prolly woulda saved Bambis mom